The best way to celebrate 'Prime days'? Quit Amazon.

Last October I decided I'd finally had enough. It was right after Jeff Bezos, owner of the Washington Post, spiked an editorial endorsing Kamala Harris for president. I'd been contemplating quitting Amazon for a long time, and this was the final straw. Broligarchs for Fascism was a bridge too far.

I'd already ditched all the Amazon Alexa products in my house a few months earlier, after their machines got a little too insistent about pushing me to order stuff, and way too intrusive. So I decided:

No Prime.

No Prime Video.

No Prime Visa.

No Audible.

No Goodreads.

No Whole Foods.

And, of course, no more Washington Post. [1]

Was this more inconvenient? Absolutely. I'd grown used to making lists of various things I was running out of (light bulbs, batteries, protein powder, cat food, etc), putting them all in my Amazon cart, and having them arrive two days later. Now I had to go actually go out and buy this stuff, like, in person. (Or — more likely — order them separately from different online stores.)

I was even willing to pay more for the privilege. For example: I recently had to scour the Internet for a dental hygiene product that was available at Amazon, Target, Walmart, and almost nowhere else. [2] I finally found a box of it on eBay, where I paid an extra $5 just so I didn't have to order it from Amazon.

It arrived a week later... in an Amazon bag, sent from an Amazon shipping center. The seller was apparently listing products on his page at a markup, then ordering them to be drop-shipped directly to me. This is known as 'Amazon to eBay arbitrage,' and while it's not illegal, it does violate both Amazon and eBay policies (and is also just shitty). [3]

I include this anecdote to point out just how hard it is to remove Amazon entirely from one's life. And that's not even counting the companies using Amazon web services that most of us aren't even aware of. [4]

Monopoly money

Amazon absorbs just over 40% of all online sales in the US. Walmart.com accounts for nearly 11%. Everyone else is in the low single digits. That's why the FTC and 17 state attorneys general sued the company for 'illegally maintaining monopoly power' in 2023.

We already know Amazon treats its employees like vassals, engages in blatant union-busting, and plans to replace as many of them as possible with robots. Here's an excerpt from a 2024 report by Oxfam on the working conditions inside Amazon warehouses:

"Amazon warehouse workers are anxious, depressed, and burned out. Nearly three quarters report feeling pressure to work faster. More than half report that the pace of work makes it hard for them to use the bathroom. In Amazon warehouses, production standards—not people—reign supreme."

Per a company-wide memo sent by Amazon CEO Andy Jassy last April:

“As we roll out more Generative AI and agents, it should change the way our work is done... We will need fewer people doing some of the jobs that are being done today, and more people doing other types of jobs. It’s hard to know exactly where this nets out over time, but in the next few years, we expect that this will reduce our total corporate workforce as we get efficiency gains from using AI extensively across the company.”

Amazon is also screwing over the third-party merchants that account for 25% of its revenue, taking more and more money out of their pockets.

And then there's the not one but two Bezos mega-yachts, and that... $50 million wedding in Venice. I start to retch just thinking about it.

So, to recap:

1. Bending the knee to fascists

2. Aggressively intrusive marketing

3. Monopolistic practices

4. Treating employees like dogs

5. Grotesque displays of wealth

Is free two-day shipping really worth all of that?

Those boots are made for walking

I understand Jeff Bezos is not exactly quaking in his Lucchese Forde Alligator Cowboy Boots over the fact that I've dropped Amazon. I get it. And there are a lot of other companies that deserve to be boycotted, whether its Fortune 500 companies rolling back their diversity and inclusion policies to TV networks offering multi-million-dollar bribes to settle spurious lawsuits. It's easier to count the companies that have still held onto at least some of their principles.

On the other hand, look at what Tesla is going through. Pissing off your customers should hurt you. And while it's far easier to avoid buying a Cybertruck than it is to give up Prime Day deals and hassle-free returns, it's not impossible.

The question I always come down to is, do I really want to give my money to these people? Especially when they already have far too much of it? For me, it's an easy decision.

Have you given up supporting fascist-friendly companies? Share your stories in the comments or email me: [email protected].

[1] Also, if Jeff Bezos ever invited me to take a ride into low-earth orbit on Blue Origin, I have resolved to politely tell him to intercourse himself. Maybe not so politely.

[2] The seller in this transaction disputed my claim he was engaging in arbitrage (though he was), then offered me a discount coupon if I would retract the feedback I left for him describing what he did. Intercourse him, too.

[3] I'm also boycotting Target & Walmart, for similar political reasons. What can I say? I'm a quitter.

[4] Amazon Web Services accounts for more than half of the company's profits. It's what's paying for all that two-day shipping.